Baniye ki Girlfriend :- Kal tujhe kitne call kiye, lekin tune phone nahi uthaya.
Baniya :- Kyu uthaau, 30Rs. deke jo gana lagwaya wo kya tera baap sunega ??
_______________________________________________
Baniya donates blood to santa.
Santa gifts him a car.
Baniya donate again.
this time santa give 1kg BARFI.
Baniya: bas
santa:ab meri ragho me baniye ka khoon dood rha hai.
_______________________________________________
Baniya: Yeh kela(banana) kaisay diya?
Shopkeeper: 1Rs.
Baniya: 60 Paisa ka deta hai?
S.K: 60 paise mein to sirf chilka milega.
Baniya:Ley 40 paisay, chilka rakh aur kela day de
_______________________________________________
Titanic K Sath Baniya Bhi Doob Raha Tha
Aur Hans Bhi Raha Tha
Dost: Oye Hans Kyun Raha Hai?
Baniya: Shukar Hai Main Ne Return Ticket Nahi Khareeda
_______________________________________________
AGG Girl: Jab Dad so jayenge to me gali me SIKKA fekungi, awaz sunkar tum turant under aa jana !!!
But Boy sikka fekne ke ek ghante baad aaya
AGG Girl: Itni der kyo laga di???
Gupta Boy: Wo mai sikka DHUND raha tha!!!
AGG Girl - Pagal wo to "DHAAGA BAANDH" ke feka tha, wapas khich liya!
_______________________________________________
1 JUDGE
1 MBA
1 Baniya
Kashti Me Ja Rahe The
Ek bada JIN Aya aur Bola:
Samandar me Koi Cheez feko
Agar Maine Dhond Li To Mai Tumhe Maar Donga
na dhoond paya to me Tumhara Ghulam
.
.
JUDGE ne Pensil Fenki
JIN ne Dhund Li aur Use Maar Diya
.
M.B.A. ne Memory Card Phenka JIN ne Dhund Liya aur Use Bhi Maar Diya
.
.
BANIYE ne Disprin tablet Fenki
Wo Pani Me gayab ho gai
.
BANIYA :chal Beta, dukan me bohot kaam hai
_______________________________________________
Papu- Lalaji dettol soap hai kya..? Lalaji (naak se ungli nikalte huye)- hanji hai ji. Papu- toh fir haath dho ke 1kg chaawal de do
_______________________________________________
Aur Jaat ko
bole ke tu 3 var maang le.
Aur Baniye ko bole ki kyunki tu kai saal se meri pooja kar hai....
To jo bhi Jaat maangega uska doogna tum ko mil jaayega.
Jaat ne 100 beeghe dharti maang li,
To Baniya ko 200
beeghe mil gayi.
Jaat ne ek jodi bail maange to Baniya ko do jodi mil gaye.
Jaat ko ye nahi bhaya, Waise hi usko Baniyya pasand nahi tha.
To Jaat thodi der soch ke bola 'Shiv ji Maharaj, tu bahut
balwaan hai,
tune mujh pe kripa ki hai,
Ab tu mujhe itna
maar ki mein adhmaraa ho jaaun"
_______________________________________________
Dad:kitne paise kharche?
.........Son:Rs1000
Dad:Angrily 1000?
Son:Ha wo itne he layi thi
_______________________________________________
Bhikhari Uske Paas Aaya. Bhikhari: “Bhagwan Ke Naam Par Kuch Paise De
Do 4 Din Se Bhukha Hun.”
Baniye Ke Mann Mein Pata Nahi Kya Aaya Baniye Ne 100 Ka Note Nikala Aur Bhikhari Ko Dikhate Hue Bola
“100 Ke Chhutte Hain Tere Paas.”
Bhikhari With Excitement: “Haan Bilkul Hai, Bhala Ho Tumhara.”
Baniya Muskurate Hue Bola: “To Pehle Wo To Kharch Kar Le Bc
_______________________________________________
Baniya Girl: Aj dady ne muje tumhare sath bike pe dekh liya
Boy: Shit! fir kya bole?
baniya Girl: Bus ki ticket k paise wapas le liye!!! Bohot strict hai wo
_______________________________________________
obituary ke kya
charges honge?
Newspaper: Rs.50 per word.
Baniya : Oh bahut zyaada hain, Achha likho "Chacha Guzar Gaye"
Newspaper: Sir! It should be minimum 6 words!
Baniya : Oh ho! Zara sochne do..... Achha likho....... ......... .
Chacha Guzar Gaye - Maruti for Sale
_______________________________________________
Baniya at Petrol Pump: "5 Rupaiye Ka petrol daal do."
Pumpwala (gusse me): "Itna sara dalwa ke kahaan jana hai?"
Baniya: "Jaana kahi nahi hai pagle,Hum to aise hee paise udaate hai"
_______________________________________________
Baniya antim sanse le raha tha, bola meri biwi kaha hai?
.
Biwi- main yahi hu
.
Meri beti?
.
Beti- yahi hu
.
Aur mera beta?
.
Beta- yahi hu
.
Saale sab yahi ho to dukan par kaun hai
Baniya antim sanse le raha tha, bola meri biwi kaha hai?
.
Biwi- main yahi hu
.
Meri beti?
.
Beti- yahi hu
.
Aur mera beta?
.
Beta- yahi hu
.
Saale sab yahi ho to dukan par kaun hai
_______________________________________________
Other Funny Stuff
_______________________________________________